14. Ode to Noodles

Ode to Noodles is a collection of poems, most of them written by Sgt. Harry Jinkerson, who served with the department from 1969 to 1995. The poems are of “misadventures” that have occurred to officers. Shortly after these incidents the poems were posted throughout the department and were simply signed “Ode to Noodles.” Most people did not know the author of the poems, although some suspected Sgt. Jinkerson.

The poems began when an officer on patrol ran over a dog named “Noodles.” This officer was at the end of many jokes regarding “poor Noodles” and Sgt. Jinkerson decided to write his first poem, called “An Ode to Noodles.” Below are different poems written by Sgt. Jinkerson and a short description of the event that the poem was derived from.

“An Ode to Noodles”

It was bright and brisk in town that day.

When poor ole Noodles went out to play.

The kids were happy and without a care,

cuz their pal Noodles was always there.

But Noodle's time had come around,

as into the street he made a bound.

He looked to the left then dashed to the right,

but ole 69 was nowhere in sight.

He dashed into the street that day

and bought a ticket marked “one way.”

The unit came by with a whoosh and a splatt.

And made ole Noodles part of Washtenaw and Platt.

It was bright and brisk in Ann Arbor Town,

where someplace children laugh and play around.

But a loyal friend is gone and a house is bare.

Poor ole Noodles in no longer there.

Ode to the Wall

This misadventure occurred when the officers in briefing were given “safety instructions” on how to safely handle their firearms. This instruction took place in the briefing room and resulted in the discharge of the weapon of the instructor. Shortly thereafter “Ode to Noodles” struck with the following poem:

Hole, hole in the wall, who's the fairest shot of all?

Everyone knows but the wall can't say

Who put the hole in the wall that day.

One fine morning in the briefing room,

during a safety demo a gun did boom.

The rangemaster was showing the way,

on how a trigger shoe did not play.

The men there had no time to hide,

when the gun went off, Pear thought he died.

Lt. Rady trembled when the boom did sound,

then sighed in relief when the hole was found.

So to all brave men tried and true,

it's a lesson on what not to do.

When your weapon goes on display,

Remember the how of the hole that day.

Breath Deep

This incident occurred in September of 1991, the Friday before the Michigan v. Notre Dame Football game. The visiting Irish fans took to the bars along S. University. When the liquored up fans began filtering from the bars they congregated along S. University, trading chants with U of M fans. Soon the two groups began to lose control and before long a riot ensued. Officers attempted to move the groups from the street but they responded by pelting the officers with rocks and bottles. Windows were being destroyed to area businesses and street signs were being torn down. Sgt. Jinkerson arrived on scene and the street was ablaze in tear gas before long. The tear gas was very effective, although the officers did not know it was going to be set off and none had gas masks!

Let me tell you my friends of another tale

Of how justice did once again momentarily prevail

A tale of those bold ones who wear blue

Fighting the rocks and bottles in the air and Oh Yes-Gas Too!

Twas the night before the Notre Dame/U of Michigan Game

With the students partying down and not at all being very tame

Around midnight they decided S. U. they were going to take

Two thousand or more gathered and all hell began to break

Cops from all around were called to S. U. in Ann Arbor town

But alas they were outnumbered more than 40 to 1

The men in blue tried to break it up by moving through the crowd

But the students continued to get more rowdier and loud

The students began to throw rocks and bottles at the cops

When Sgt. Harry-O came on the scene and said this must stop

Fights and brawls and damage started to take place

The good Lt. and Sgt. Harry stated we must put an end to this with haste

The students had not seen or smelled gas in over 20 years

And what should have scared them was Harry's grin from ear to ear

With the gas thick in the air the battle raged for 2 or 3 hours

The Lt. and Sarge saying the streets are going to be ours

With the last canister fired from Harry's big gas gun

The Lt. called for a two-time type step run

But the cop's frustration that night had gotten somewhat large

What the good Lt. got was a rebel war cry and a full-fledged charge

The deeds of the night were finally put to a stop

No one was left on the streets but the cops

Do not worry my friends about any future events to come to task

For Harry-O has filled black bag with plenty more gas

Ode to the Frisbee

In this incident, Sgt. Dick Cygan was on patrol when he came upon a group of students playing frisbee in the street. He asked them to stop as they were blocking traffic and they did. He was driving by later and found they were again playing frisbee and he felt appropriate action was necessary. He exited his patrol car, took their frisbee and cut it in half!

The students soon complained to Sgt. Cygan's superiors and Sgt. Cygan was left to explain why he took care of the situation as he did.

Let me tell you my friends of a tale

That justice did once momentarily prevail

In an exploit so sharp and true

Because of one who wears the blue.

Sgt. Cygan did ride one afternoon eve

In his mighty car driving steed

As he looked for the crowds that his around

In the streets of Ann Arbor Town

He looked near and far and high and low

For any and all that he could send to way down below

But alas all were gone and fled

For they had heard that he was after their heads

He turned a corner and did spy at last

A spectacle that made him gasp

For a frisbee was flying around

Blocking traffic and scattering people abound

This must stop this minute said he

To the gents that were throwing the frisbee

All kinds of problems can come to be

By you doing this in the streets so carelessly

With that he left thinking his word had been heard

But as he turned the corner they flipped him the bird

And when he returned to check the gents

They were back to their merriment

With the firmness and coolness of men who wear blue

He grabbed the frisbee from the two

And thinking this would be the last laugh

He quickly sliced the frisbee in half

The two men ran and cried and cried

And the Sarge was caught and tried

But don't worry my friends and lament

For now he carries frisbee repair cement

Wings

Ode to Noodles struck after Officers Mark Defrain and Mark Purcell attempted to arrest a subject and ended up in a car chase, which did not end in their favor.

Let me tell you my friends of another tale

Of how justice did once again prevail

A tale so daring and bold for the men who wear the Blue

Of Defrain and Purcell who flew through the night while in pursuit

On a dark and dangerous night it is said

Two officers tried to arrest a subject in bed

The suspect became wise to them and took to flight

Hopping in his car and driving wildly out of sight

The chase was on and soon led them out of town

With the men in Blue pursuing like a hunting hound

Out on I-94 to Baker Road they went

The suspect wondering if he was to be heaven or hell sent

The county mounties now assisting in the lead of the chase

and Defrain and Purcell trying their best to keep up with the pace

But alas, knowledge of the roads would prove to be the better teacher

As Defrain and Purcell would soon be watching from the bleachers

At terrific speed, a curve in the road came into sight

Which suddenly put Defrain and Purcell in quite a plight

Cries of “Oh Shit” could be heard during the 5 second flight

As they left the road and curve and sailed into the night

Sixty feet or so later they came down with a splash

The Dukes of Hazard would have paid to film this crash

In the middle of the swamp on top of their car

They could see and hear the lights and sirens in the distance afar

The suspect got busted later that night

As the patrol was pulled from the swamp, Oh what a sight

Badges not wings is what they should remember they wear

Planes not patrol cars fly on a wing and a prayer